I'm Learning the Power of Going Away For the Weekend and Keeping Myself Company - August 31 - September 3, 2012

"I just don't sleep on weekends.  Scratch that...I just don't sleep."


Friday, August 31, 2012

So, I really didn't get to go away, but I am spending a lot of time getting to know myself better.  Up and going early for a day off.  Pretty excited about my long weekend...4 days off of work and I am going to do my best not to work.  Granted, I have already sent 5 emails to myself with things to do when I get back to work on Tuesday.  I haven't actually looked at my laptop, but I can't turn off my brain or phone.  How does one truly stop working???  I'll take any and all suggestions!

I haven't been sleeping well because my throats sores are hurting badly.  So I decide to run early morning errands before I plan on staying home for the majority of the weekend.  Well, my day started early and went much later than I had planned.  First I ran to Whole Foods to get vitamins and a few other things.  Then Target to stock up on Lysol, antibacterial wipes, bleach, etc.  All the stuff that should help keep me healthy and keep germs at bay.  I also had to stock up on baking supplies for Neda's new grandson to be.  After shopping I had lunch with Cindi and Kim.  Cindi arrived first and wiped the table, chair, menu, etc. with antibacterial wipes.  Then I came in with plastic wear.  I'm sure that the waitress thought we were crazy, but she didn't say a word.  I made sure that all my food was cooked well, not fresh fruits or veggies.  Being as safe as I can be.  Then Cindi and I ran a few more errands for the day.  We got a lot done, visited with Kevin & Kelly, and then I headed home to bed.  I'm not actually tired (shocking), but my body is sore.

Once I'm home there is a great article that I read about cancer.  It is written by an oncologist that talks about cancer being a noun and not an adjective.  It really makes me think.  So many things describe me but all too often cancer is in the description.  I'll meet someone who knows someone who knows me and they know me as "so and so's friend with cancer".  I'd rather be "so and so's friend who loves to bake..or works too many hours...or enjoys red wine...or has little feet...or makes a great bloody Mary...or is a good cook.  I happen to have cancer, but I have so many passions.  
"In an ideal world, all of us would be defined by who we are, who we love, our passions, and our accomplishments.  I don't believe that any of us should be described by whatever medical condition we happen to face.  In oncology, it is an ideal that we should embrace, to ensure quality care for those who have entrusted us, literally, with their lives." Don S. Fison, MD, FACP.  Something to sleep on tonight.

http://connection.asco.org/Commentary/Article/ID/3285/Is-Cancer-an-Adjective.aspx

Saturday, September 1, 2012

It's a rainy day.  I'm in a little bit of a funk, but I have so much to do.  Today's Bailey's birthday so I get an morning text with a picture of the birthday girl opening her gifts in Michigan.  I love to see the pictures and it makes me miss the weekend even more.  As the rain came down and my funk grew larger mt front doorbell rings.  I almost didn't answer, but the man was persistent.  He had a beautiful bouquet of flowers to brighten a crumby day....all the way from Danielle in Florida!  I have to say that lately I get cards and gifts exactly when I need a pick me up!  The bright flowers are perfect today and they give me a much needed lift to get things done.

Frank isn't feeling well today...or maybe he's feeding off my mood.  Henry is getting into everything around the house.  I can hear cupboards banging and things getting thrown off the counters, bookshelves, etc.  On gloomy days when I'm stuck at home it is good to have four-legged company.  They don't complain, they like to cuddle, and they talk a ton...well, Frank does.

I spend the day baking 6 dozen cupcakes for the shower.  Well, I burnt a dozen, so only 5 dozen survived.  I don't remember the last time that I ruined a batch and to be honest I'm not sure how it happened today.  I can't rally taste what I'm cooking/baking and now I'm burning things...UGH!!!  

The highlights of the day are text, videos, and pictures from Michigan.  I promised that I wouldn't share on the blog but I was crying laughing when the video came across my phone. Let's just say "shake it Chris!".   The weather may not be perfect, but the cocktails look cold and the laughter seems to be plenty in MI!  Yet another weekend that I should be spending in Michigan with the Papesh Family.  Pretty bummed that I am stuck at home but my counts are still low and I am a little nervous about getting too far from home and being in a full house.  Luckily, they were able to "rent" my room out for the weekend to Dave & Laurie.  

Also spent more time today trying to get the medicine for my throat and mouth sores.  Quality time on the phone with Walgreens and my insurance...good times!  After being told that it was being made and covered by insurance a couple of days ago I am back to being told that it wasn't made and isn't being covered.  I told Walgreens to make it regardless of the cost.  Apparently my insurance would rather pay for me getting super sick from not eating because of mouth and throat sores.  I'm sure that will cost them a lot more than the medicine that my doctor prescribed.  Ugh...more big business issues.  A full day in the house.  :(

Sunday, September 2, 2012

The sun is shining today and I decide to leave the house.  First stop is a cupcake delivery.  These will be the last cupcakes that I make while on chemo.  I don't want to ruin the joy of making something that I love and chemo is taking that joy away.  I then do a quick stop at the Apple Store for help with my iPad.  If I'm going to be spending so much time at home I am going to have my favorite toy!  It is a quick in and out when they first open, so there are bot too many people or too many germs.  Then I get an invite from Jennifer for lunch.  Taylore is home for the weekend and Jim is cooking.  I make sure that everyone is healthy in the house and then decide to go.  It is a relaxing couple of hours of laughing, telling stories, and visiting...just what the doctor ordered.  And Johnnie (Jennifer's Dad) made me chili to take home!  Well worth the stop.  The day didn't last too long, I blogged and went to bed early.  The more time I spend in bed the happier I am that I bought a new mattress in the Spring! But I also realize that someday I need to redecorate my bedroom that has been the same since I was 23...I definitely need new pillows...and my blanket has been washed too many times.  

Monday. September 3, 2012

The last day of my 4 day weekend.  The plan has been to go to the lake with Cindi & Luke to visit Cyndi and Stone.  They have a beautiful property that is relaxing.  I can sit out in the sun and pretty much rest all day.  I decided to bake one of my favorite cakes...vanilla wafer cake...but it didn't come out of the pan in one piece. Epic fail.  What is happening to my baking skills?!?!  I may not be able to taste things but I never burn or under bake.  My taste buds and timing are off.  The cake is quickly replaced by my "famous" deviled eggs.  Well, famous in my mind...that's all that counts.  We head to the lake.  Luke is driving.  I'm not gonna lie...I was nervous being in the back seat, but he has a perfect 10 & 2.  Just like my Mom.  I thought that it was going to be a small crowd but the whole family was there.  It is great to see everyone but I try to keep my distance from all the kids.  I never actually got wet, but I did go on the jet ski with Becky (Rebecca).  It was so hot out and the fresh air felt amazing.  More importantly, my scarf stayed on through the time on the jet ski.  The only bad thing about all the fresh air was the fact that it aggravated my already soar throat and mouth.  Fortunately I had my Biotene gel and mouthwash with me to relieve some of the pain.  I had a great day at Cyndi and Stone's.  Relaxing, sitting in the shade, going on the pontoon, laughing when we were pulled over on the boat, visiting with friends that I love dearly...but I couldn't wait to get home.  My body is tired and my head hurts.

Another call to my insurance & Walgreens...still no compound for my throat.  :(

Sleep well!

XOXO,

S

Flowers from Danielle

Jet ski on Lincoln Lake...don't worry...I didn't drive!

Me and Rebecca

If you or anyone you love is facing cancer PLEASE reach out to the American Cancer Society.  Nobody should face cancer alone.   http://www.cancer.org/  or 800.227.2345.   24 hours a day 365 days a year.