Cancer & Cupcakes...well, maybe a little more cancer than cupcakes these days.: Round 4 - Let's Get It Done!

"So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about."

GOOD MORNING! I wake up and I am refreshed from some sleep and the bad parts of yesterday will stay in the past. Today is round 4 of 6 treatments of chemo. I do have some very mixed emotions about today. The truth is that I could be done with chemo today. The protocol is four rounds of chemo, but Dr. Robinson and I have decided that 6 rounds will be best for me. So today I will have my 12 round of chemo in my life. Chemo that is just kicking my butt this time around. So I pack up my cupcakes, snacks, gift from Bonita, iPad, etc. All the things that would allow me to actually move into the infusion center for a few days and plenty of things that will never actually make it out of the bag. I simply want to be prepared! Next stop is to pick up Mom, head to Whole Foods, and the go to the Wheaton location. I have on PLENTY of makeup and my best smile.

Today's entourage will include Mom, Dad, Chris and Kim! This is Kim's first time coming to treatment with me and I am excited to see her. She has taken the day off of work to join me. Upon arriving I check-in and see Jackie. She mentions that I look much better today. I made a snide remark about the fact that "clearly I am not supposed to look like I'm having a bad day at the offices." I felt terrible right when I said it. Some thoughts I should just keep to myself. Craig takes all of my stats, Jackie comes in to do her thing and then I wait for Dr. Robinson. The first thing she said to me was in direct response to my day yesterday and she had a note in her inbox about it. UGH...I am fuming mad at this point and I was sure to give her my side of the story. She seems to completely understand and we move on to the physical exam. She continues to be very pleased with my progress and says that she is only able to feel a small amount of the tumor and and lymph nodes. This is GREAT news! I am still worried that the chemo isn't actually working and the cancer is spreading, but that is something that I will continue to work on. We talk about the pain and she is confident that it is being caused the Neupogen shots. My ribs, breast bones, arms, etc. hurt the majority of the time. I guess it is just something that will stay a part of my "normal" as I continue the journey with treatment.

I came out of the office and Judy was in the waiting room with her daughter, friend, brand new grandson, and Dr. Robinson was holding him! Judy is the nice lady that has had the same treatment time as I do. She always takes a cupcake, so I of course think she is wonderful. She is GLOWING today! He grandchild is beautiful! Judy is currently on Herceptin. I get a little excited when I hear someone is on Herceptin because I was on the clinical trial for the drug when it was in it experimental stage. Herceptine (Trastuzumab) is a monoclonal antibody that interferes with the HER2/neu receptor. Its main use is to treat certain breast cancers.

The HER receptors are proteins that are embedded in the cell membrane and communicate molecular signals from outside the cell to inside the cell, and turn genes on and off. The HER proteins regulate cell growth, survival, adhesion, migration, and differentiation—functions that are amplified or weakened in cancer cells. In some cancers, notably some breast cancers, HER2 is over-expressed, and causes breast cells to reproduce uncontrollably.

Antibodies are molecules from the immune system that bind selectively to different proteins. Trastuzumab is an antibody that binds selectively to the HER2 protein. When it binds to defective HER2 proteins, the HER2 protein no longer causes cells in the breast to reproduce uncontrollably. This increases the survival of people with cancer. However, cancers usually develop resistance to trastuzumab.

The original studies of Herceptin showed that it improved overall survival in late-stage (metastatic) breast cancer from 20.3 to 25.1 months, but there is controversy over whether Herceptin is effective in earlier stage cancer. Herceptin is also controversial because of its cost, as much as $100,000 per year, and while certain private insurance companies in the U.S. and government health care systems in Canada, England and elsewhere have refused to pay for Herceptin for certain patients, some companies have since accepted Herceptin treatment as a covered preventative treatment.

Herceptin was originally developed in mice, as a mouse antibody. Because humans have immune reactions to mouse proteins, it was later developed into a human (humanized) antibody. Because the antibodies were produced from one cell that was grown into a clone of identical cells, it is called a monoclonal antibody.

Herceptin is also being studied for use with other cancers. It has been used with some success in women with uterine papillary serous carcinomas that overexpress HER2/neu.

Sorry for all the technical talk that I borrowed from the drug website. It is literally a drug that I do not know how to explain to people. I never actually received it 12 years ago, but I am a part of the control part of the study and the still contact me yearly for updates. This year's update will not be all that great. But Herceptin helped my friend Stacey for many years, it has helped many women, and today I discover that it is helping Judy.

WE then head over to the infusion center. It is a BUSY place today but that have my seat saved for me. It is like "my bag" at kickboxing. I literally get nervous about not getting the same seat that I have had each treatment. Maybe I do need to see "Dr. XXX" for being a creature of habit, but certainly not for my emotional state. We all start getting settled and Kim arrives! Kim is always a calming factor in my life. We just need to work on her "inside voice". ;) Cupcakes are handed out and everyone likes the turtle treats. They have been dubbed "random acts of cupcakes" because I get a seem to be getting cupcakes before each round of chemo. HAPPY ME!

There is a new lady that is starting today. She and her husband are here for the first time and they are very friendly. I spoke with her a lot about the journey and her family. The have three young children and they are facing the journey head on! They both have a fantastic attitude. Beata (sp?) takes a cupcake, but Terry does not...I've got my eye on you Terry! :) Just kidding...it means there are more for the rest of us. Even Dr. Robinson had a cupcake! That's a big step for her.

Kim and my sister bring gifts. Kim brings banana bread and a photo book of my favorite "things" in Michigan. What is great about Michigan is that my favorite "things" are my Papesh Family! Oh, and Oberon. They know me so well! The book has great photos of all the kids and people that I love. Even photos of me that I try to avoid having taken. I absolutely love it. I couldn't go to Michigan this year, but Michigan came to me! My sister brought a cute, little, stuffed, purple hand with a face on it. It is to represent the "high five" that Dr. Robinson gave me last checkup! I also have the gift from Bonita from my box of goodies. It was good to see the box is getting empty. That means I am closer to the end. Today it is a box of note cards. I have SO MANY thank you notes to write. I don't know where o start, but I will eventually get them all out. High hopes! We all sit around talking, laughing, and having a good time. Oddly enough I find great comfort in my treatment days. I am forced to relax and leave work behind. More importantly I get to spend quality time with people that I love more than anything. If I have learned nothing more than the importance of family and friends during this journey I will have learned more than enough!

Dad left two times during treatment. He has found a Ace Hardware that he likes and then walked to Whole Foods. He goes to Menards several times EACH day, so I am glad he was able to find a hardware store...it's his "happy place".

Round 4 is complete! Whoo Hoo! We head to Magiano's for dinner on our way home. Just the girls and too much food. Dad went to church and headed home. It has gotten very cold and gloomy out and I am getting tired. It is good to continue the day of relaxing and spending time laughing and talking. We end the day with hugs in the parking lot. Then Mom and I head to Kohls and home. I'm getting weak, tired, and ready to sleep.

Be well!

XOXO,

S