Happy BERTDAY to Me!!! - July 6, 2012

"It's your birthday...it's your party!"


Today is my 41st BERTDAY...I know, you are thinking to yourselves "no way is she 41, she doesn't look a day over 33!".  You are also probably thinking "what the heck is a BERTDAY??"  Well, apparently, when I say 'birthday" it sounds like "Bertday", so I have embraced it with my girlfriends.  I was called out on this by Cindi and Steph at one of my Annual Girls Night In Holiday Pajama Parties.  I never even realized that they had made fun of me, Steph actually thought I did it on purpose, and everyone had a great laugh.  So, now they get text a random picture of Bert on their Bertdays.  And let me say, there are some pretty funny pictures of Bert out there!  So, if I wish you a Happy Bertday, please know it is because I can't say birthday! I'm also the girl in our group that sends the reminded text to all the other girls when it is one of our birthdays. With today's technology I am sure that they all have birthdays marked in their calendars, but I would feel badly if someone forgot.  :)  


Wow, what a difference from a year ago when we celebrated my 40th!  A surprise party, cocktails, limo to the city, a show and dancing the night away...can't we just go back to that this year??? Or can't we go back to my birthday dinner request that I make each year to my Mom...sloppy Joe's, on really good buns, American cheese, pickles, and potato chips??? Mom wanted to make it this year, but I just wasn't in the mood to celebrate. My 30th birthday was the the last day I wore my wig from the first cancer and I had hoped I'd never have to wear a wig again...wow, what a difference 11 years makes


The morning started early with birthday texts, calls, etc.  Then Facebook started going off like crazy and I started panicking.  I had made it where people couldn't post on my page when I found out my cancer was back.  I just didn't want to be outed, but thought it would be strange if I left it closed for my birthday.  It would have been obvious or I would have seemed rude.  So, I stalked the page all day to make sure that NOTHING was mentioned about my cancer.  Again, not because I was embarrassed, but because I did not have a solid plan in place.  Facebook and texting can really make a person feel special on their BERTDAY!!  


Mom and I had planned to do a little shopping in the morning, but plans changed pretty quickly.  Jeff and Cindi had gotten me a bone scan for my gift!!  Whoo hoo...the gift that keeps on giving.  So, Cindi was calling, the hospital was calling, everyone was involved with this.  He had schedules changed and people staying late to get this done for me.  Jeff and Cindi have been amazing through this whole process and the tests they were getting done so quickly for me were the icing on my birthday cake.  So, my birthday plans changed...a little shopping with Mom, drive-thru lunch, a visit to Silver Cross for an injection, more shopping, and then back to Silver for the scan.  It was a busy day, but a much appreciated gift.  After the scan was complete Jeff met me in the back to go over it and tell me that my bones were clear!!!  It is good to have a "brother" who is a radiologist!  No waiting.  Bones scan complete and he even made the arrangements for my brain MRI and Liver MRI next week. Mom was ammazing today. I feel like I was dragging her from spot to spot, but she took it all in Stride! Love you MOM! Things are moving along nicely.


I spent most of the evening alone. I climbed into bed around 6 PM with tears running down my face. I had great news today, but that doesn't eliminate the fear and the anxiety. It doesn't remove the cancer that is already there and I am still in fear of what they may find in my brain and what the small spot on my liver may be. It is not a logical move for the cancer, but getting cancer twice under 40 isn't logical. By 6:30 PM I couldn't stay in bed and think about it any more. I needed to get out and get out quickly. But I had turned down plans and offers. I kept telling people that I already had plans because I didn't want to break them if the bone scan did not come back clear. So, off to the nail salon for a quick pedicure, Chinese carryout with a bottle of beer while I wait, and then I thought I would be off to bed.  But Cindi and Steph had other plans.  So, we sat in the backyard with our toes in the pool, drinking a few beers and chatting.  Simple, but it was good to not be alone. Sometimes you don't need a big party, you just need great family and friends...oh and maybe a Buddha Butter Dish from the Tyler's with a sock monkey wine bag!!! Many other fantastic gifts, but those made me laugh and smile...they know me so well! And there is nothing better than a handmade card from kids. I'll post pictures of some of the great ones I have received. I love all the "neices and nephews" in my life. The American Cancer Society is the official sponsor of Birthdays! We fight each day for a world with less cancer and more birthdays! I celebrated 11 birthdays in between my cancers...11 more years with sloppy Joe's, Mom & Dad, Chris & Tom, and Momo. 11 more years with the best friends in the world! Be ready to celebrate on my next BERTDAY!!! Cancer will be behind me and a world of endless possibilities will be for the taking! 


 XOXO, 


 S

If you or anyone you love is facing cancer PLEASE reach out to the American Cancer Society.  Nobody should face cancer alone.   http://www.cancer.org/  or 800.227.2345.   24 hours a day 365 days a year.  WE are here for you.